A Piece Of Me

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Hello, world. Or, hello to the three of you. I thought it was time for a quick update. 1 out of 3 of you may recall that I was pregnant last time I posted. Guess what? Not anymore! Little Sofia was born on Friday, July 31st at 11:27 am. She weighed 8.5 pounds, and measured 20.75 inches long. Beautiful and healthy, with a head FULL of dark hair. She was bigger than anyone expected. I was all belly, and everyone swore I’d have a 6 or 7 pounder. BUT NOPE! She surprised us all. My husband says she came out with her arm sticking out, like making a fist. Almost as if she was saying, “Woohoo, I did it!” Yeah, she did feel a little funny on the way out, so that explains it. I was so busy trying to catch my breath, that it took me a few minutes before I thought to ask, “Wait, is she still a girl?” Haha.

All things considered, I had a pretty good birth experience. I was told I pushed for 45 minutes or so, no more than an hour. I was TOLD this, because I seriously do NOT remember. When you’re in that much pain, you have no concept of time. I mean, it obviously felt like forever in the moment. I had contractions all day Thursday, but they became really intense around midnight/early Friday. Oddly enough, I was very calm that whole day with contractions. It’s like I still couldn’t believe that I would actually be giving birth soon. Even when I made it to the hospital, it felt unreal. My whole pregnancy felt that way though.

I have a high tolerance for pain but WOW… Words cannot describe that kind of pain. They should come up with a new word for contractions, because that one just doesn’t do it justice. At one point I even begged for them to cut me open to get her out, haha. I was not eligible for an epidural due to low blood platelets. Would have been too risky. I thought my face might explode from pushing, not to mention my lungs. Pushing is hard, people. I felt out of breath for a week or two afterwards.

Almost immediately after giving birth though, it’s almost like it never even happened. All of a sudden, there’s a tiny human on your chest, and you wonder, “What do I do now? Did the doctor leave the manual somewhere?” I never imagined how stressful and overwhelming life as a mom would be. BUT every day gets a little easier. Everyone kept telling me that, but those first couple of weeks, you find it hard to believe. I cried a lot. But as hard as it is to be a sleep-deprived slave to a newborn, at the end of the day, I just remember that we have a beautiful, healthy baby girl, and that’s all we can ask for. That, and maybe a bit less fussing and crying. But it is what it is! My husband and my parents have helped keep me sane. And whenever I feel really overwhelmed, I look at my baby and think, “Wow…we made a baby…an actual human being. How amazing is that?” I find it mind-boggling how a tiny egg and a tiny swimmer can create a perfect little human! Part of me still can’t believe I’m a mom. I mean, I have a daughter… What?!

Anyway, I think I’m mostly rambling, so I’ll stop here. With a couple pictures, of course!

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Because, Why Not?

Hello? Is there anyone out there? Don’t want to show yourself? That’s cool, I’m quite experienced in the art of talking to myself. It’s not something to brag about though…

I haven’t the slightest clue what brought me here after months…MONTHS! Poor neglected blog that no one gives two figs about. I stopped writing, stopped getting readers, stopped caring…sort of. Had nothing to say anymore. But today I came back here and remembered how much fun I had with this in the beginning. I loved interacting with all you internet strangers. This is not to say I’m back. But I thought I’d give at least one more life update, because, why not? Who’s gonna stop me?

I am now 34 weeks pregnant, with a baby girl. I can’t believe how quickly these 8 months have gone. I still feel like I only JUST announced my pregnancy. Still haven’t quite wrapped my head around the fact that I’m gonna be a mom…a MOM! *Deep breath* Holy shit, that’s a scary thought! I haven’t so much as held a baby in SO MANY YEARS, I can’t even tell you. I’m afraid that when they hand her to me, I’m gonna feel completely clueless. But hopefully that whole mother’s instinct thing is real, and everything will just click, and I won’t be a total dummy.

On the plus side, I already love her, so that’s a start, right? At the end of the day, no one is born knowing how to be a mom. Sure, some people have experience, say, with changing diapers, but I’ll get there! I’m trying not to stress about how quickly time is going, though it’s hard not to. Still need to find a pediatrician, finish buying baby gear, and get the nursery together. I hope we get a chance to paint her room between this weekend and next. I think it’ll feel more real once we have a room that LOOKS like it’s meant for a baby, rather than the randomness that it is now. We shall see.

So yeah, I’m here, still pregnant, super uncomfortable, but otherwise okay. If you’re out there, I hope all is well with you too. And if no one’s reading this, well then…you suck. 🙂

~Lily~

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Yes, I’m Positive…

Hello, world. I thought I’d give this a try again. You should know that, having been away from the blogging scene for so long, I have become a little shy, perhaps needy, and desperate for approval. (Slight exaggeration.) If only 2 or 3 people like/comment on this post, I will be heart-broken and possibly never post again. Just a little something to keep in mind.

I have some news to share. First a quick update on my life. I got engaged December 2013. We bought and moved into our first home in August 2014. We are still unmarried (but will be resolving that soon). Mostly it’s because planning a wedding in Puerto Rico (where we have tons of family) is way too stressful for a lazy person such as myself. I also don’t have enough vacation days to deal with that. So city hall it is. Are you judging me? It’s not that I’m unromantic. It’s just that at the end of the day, I want him to be my husband. I don’t need all the bells and whistles, all the stress of planning, all the costs associated with that. I never dreamed of a big, white wedding, so I don’t feel like I’m missing out.

This leads me to my news. Drum-roll… WAKE UP! Did you just fall asleep on me? I’m devasted, truly. SOOOO… I am here to announce that…I’M PREGNANT!!! Just one more reason why city hall seems like the best option. Anyway, see below for evidence. We are excited, and yes, absolutely terrified. But it’s been on our minds, and it’s something we wanted to happen in the near future. It happened now, so that’s great! I will surely freak out along the way. I am waiting for the panic attack that I know I’m overdue for. I know nothing about babies (except they poop, they eat, they sleep, they cry…a lot). But I suppose no one is born KNOWING exactly what to do in every situation, right? I’ll figure it out…meh? Sure, my body may never recover. Sure, I may never sleep again. And sure, I won’t be able to save up as much money, but hey! It’ll be fun, right? Ummmm…

If anyone’s reading this, I will try to update you guys as I get more round and squishy. Right now, I’m about 13 weeks. Let the adventure begin! Until then…

Don’t scroll down until you’ve read the post…

No really, you have to read the post first.

It’s not like it’s that long of a post.

If you scroll down first, you’ll ruin everything.

Are you even listening to me?

Seriously, stop right now…

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20150120_092002_HDR~2~Lily~

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