Crickets, Meet Your Maker

Crickets and I have a love/hate relationship. As in, I love to hate them. Almost exactly a year ago, I wrote about a cricket problem. The noise was everywhere, haunting me. I stalked the crickets for days before my shoe finally found them. After they were gone, I could still hear them in my head. That’s how bad it was. I suppose they enjoy coming out to pester me this time of year because…they’re back! Did you know it was cricket season? Thanks for the warning.

I’ve yet to see one inside my apartment, but they’re close. Too close for comfort. Every single day, I see a cricket inside the foyer. (The space between the outside door and my apartment door…that’s a foyer, right?) In the last week or so, I’ve killed a handful of them. I’ve lost track. What the hell is going on with my foyer? Let me tell you, I am damn tired of being afraid to enter my own home! I open the outside door, close it, and before I unlock the second door, I do a cricket/critter check. It never fails, there’s always one. The other day, there was one just over my door. I knew it would jump inside my apartment if I cracked the door open, so I stood there like a moron, waiting for the chance to smack the shit out of it.

Do you believe that it’s bad luck to kill a cricket? Do you also believe in Santa Claus? I think it’s pretty ridiculous to believe that a cricket is good luck, and that to kill it would bring bad karma. If that were true, then I’m cursed! Who died and made crickets special anyway? Crickets are basically deformed spiders. They may not use web, but their jumping skills are not to be underestimated. My handle trembles every time I’m about to smack the life out of a cricket, because, ewww…what if it jumps on me in an effort to escape my shoe? *Cringes* I usually have to take a few swings before I finally nail the sucker, therefore increasing the odds of the cricket jumping on me. It’s a tough job, but someone has to do it.

I live in repulsion fear of these pesky critters. No matter how many crickets I murder, they keep coming back for more. I think they’re ganging up against me, trying to see how many of them can make it inside my home. I’m doing the best I can, but my boyfriend doesn’t seem to realize how serious this issue is. He left our apartment door open a crack yesterday. OPEN! The opening was large enough for a cricket to squeeze in. Simply unacceptable. I’m going to have to do something about that boyfriend of mine. How can he go on with his life, as if crickets weren’t a true menace to society my sanity?! How does he do it? *Sigh* Don’t worry about me though, I’m strong. I won’t let them win. They will not steal my sanity, not this time! (How can I lose something I never had to begin with? Yes, I just called myself crazy.)


P.S. Yes, I tend to exaggerate.

17 thoughts on “Crickets, Meet Your Maker

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  1. Here’s my warning. . . those crickets always send out scouts to check the lay of the land before attacking. As long as you keep killing the scouts the tribe (or is it a gaggle of crickets??) won’t be able to find you. One other reminder, they can squeeze through openings of about a 1/16 of an inch. Walk softly and carry a big stick. . . . beware . . . they’re everywhere.

    1. Right, the coqui looks and sounds cuter. Plus, you like never see them. I wish I didn’t have to see or hear the crickets. I’m not afraid of them, just really frickin’ annoyed by them! Lol.

  2. As you know, I can completely relate to your fear. Having said that, I recently read a post from a FB buddy who pointed out that there is a symbolism to crickets. Apparently they’re a sign surrounding moving forward. You see, crickets are unable to hop backward or sideways… I found that to be interesting. She saw one and took a picture. Her feeling on seeing it was that it was a sign to her from the universe telling her that she was making the right decision moving on with her life. Then again, she wasn’t inundated by them….. Of course, maybe yours is a sign that there’s something you SHOULD be moving forward with that you’ve been avoiding…LOL!

    Or it could just be the damned beasties trying to torment you cause they know you’re scared.

    1. Aw…I’m actually not afraid of them. They just drive me bonkers! I mean, I guess I am scared of them jumping ON me, but that’s true of any bug, cuz they’re GROSS! That’s interesting though, I didn’t know they could only jump forward and that’s what they symbolize. Hmm, still, I’m okay killing them, lol. I will continue to move forward with that. 😀

  3. Don’t show them fear! Don’t EVER show them you are afriad, or they will attack. Wait, maybe that’s wolves. Or bears. Yeah, pretty sure it’s one of those. But still! Good luck with your quest. May the odds be ever in your favor. 😉

  4. I think there’s a resident cricket in the garage of my house since I always hear it but when I turn on the light or the garage door, it shuts up abruptly. Haven’t actually seen it yet but I think I want to keep it that way. Maybe semi-peaceful coexistence is the way to go? Just kidding. Can’t stand any insects or critters myself and this summer I’ve been bombarded with spiders and other small creepy-crawlies INSIDE the house. I just gave myself goosebumps typing that….

    1. A resident cricket, oh no! I suppose it’s better to be in the garage than in the house. They are really good at hiding, as I learned last year. Bugs are so disgusting. Why couldn’t they be cute? It would be so much easier to coexist if they were cute! Lol.

  5. While I don’t have any crickets around, we have these weird insects flying around the house right now and they drive me nuts. One got into my bedroom and was hanging off the ceiling directly under me and I was literally jumping on the bed with a magazine trying to slap the thing. In a way this is why I want fall/winter to come faster so I don’t have to deal with insects. As much as I love summer I hate insects and the flies that come with it. I hope the Crickets disappear soon Lily!

    1. Oh, ewww! Bugs are so awful. I’m with you. As much as I love the warm weather, the cold weather has its perks, as it makes most bugs magically disapear!! I don’t want to freeze but it’s almost worth it. 😀 Thank you!

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