A Slightly Bumpy Road

I’m such a bitch. How’s that for an opening line? Actually, that was a little harsh. Allow me to explain myself. My boyfriend’s seasonal job ended last week, so now he’s home…all the time. Do you know what that does to a blogger? There’s no more ME time, like, EVER. I know I could just ignore him and go about my day like I always do, but it’s not the same. He’s very difficult to ignore. *Sigh* I feel like a bitch for feeling that way. I love my boyfriend with all my heart, and I’m so grateful to have him in my life. But man, it’s so nice when you get a little time to miss each other.

It’s not all my boyfriend’s fault, although it IS hard to focus when someone is constantly in your way. I’ve been getting writer’s block more often than usual…too often. Then I think that I’m letting you guys down and that just makes me feel worse. Some people started following me because they thought I was funny. Others because they enjoy reading poetry. And some may have followed me because I give excellent relationship advice. That last one is a crock of shit might not be true. So naturally, if I’m not funny, I feel like the “Funny Followers” will leave me, and if I don’t post a poem, I feel like the “Poetry Followers” will leave me. SO. MUCH. PRESSURE.

I never used to write “real” posts. By “real” posts, I mean posts like this, where I just bore you talk. Now that’s all I do. I don’t think that’s a bad thing, but my blog has definitely changed since the beginning. You could say I’m extremely random or terribly unfocused. Does my inconsistency make me a bad blogger? Is it terrible that sometimes I don’t figure out the point of my post until I’m halfway through it? When I first joined WordPress, I had no idea what I wanted to get out of this. Truthfully, I started it on a whim. It’s been six months and I still don’t know what I’m doing, but I’m glad that I can share my thoughts, even the really silly ones. I’m glad to have an outlet where I am free to express myself without being judged. (Or are you judging me right now?) I’m glad to have met such lovely people who are strangers and friends all at the same time. Blogging has been a lovely journey so far. I don’t know in which direction it will take me, or if I’ll find myself at a dead end, but I plan to enjoy the ride, bumps and all.

~Lily~

P.S. I have reached the end of this post and I still don’t know if I made a point. My fingers were typing and possibly making words that may or may not have made sense. However, my brain played no part in this writing process. It apologizes.

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34 thoughts on “A Slightly Bumpy Road

    1. Thanks Boomie, you’re always so kind. 🙂 My blog makes no sense sometimes but it’s fun, and I guess that’s all that matters. UGH, no “me” time sucks! But I guess that’s what life would be like with kids, so who am I to complain? 😉 Hugs!

  1. You seem to be overthinking things a bit. A blog is like a living thing and can change, lose focus, then gain it back a dozen times. I went through the same thing recently and it can be difficult . You can’t let your readers put pressure (imagined or otherwise) on you. Write what you want, when you want, and be as honest as you can in what you say. That’s what people appreciate more than anything else since there’s so little of it these days. Hang in there and your loyal followers will hang with you.

    1. Thanks, that’s very true. I know I over-think it sometimes. Today was one of those times but no worries. I’m never gonna stop being random and posting whatever the hell I feel like. 😀 I’m definitely grateful to those loyal followers.

  2. Don’t worry about losing followers. Most of us are too lazy or too stupid to figure out how to “unfollow.” (I’m joking, people).

    Some writing advice: if you find that you don’t figure out the point of your post until you’re halfway through it, that first half of the post probably should be edited out. Unless you intend to be pointless. 😉 I force myself to write, to just get my fingers moving across the keyboard, and eventually work and shape what I’ve written into something I hope is worthwhile. But, like you, I’m usually writing a few hundred words before I get to what I really mean to say.

    1. Haha, true. 😉 Anyway, that’s true. I do usually do that. This post went through a few changes. It probably could have been much better too but hey, no one’s perfect, right? I just need to learn to write and not get angry. I get frustrated too easily, when I know what I want to say but the words don’t come out right. Ugh! 😉

  3. I love everything you write and talk about, Lily! When my hubby was working away for seven days at a time it was utter bliss – then he’d come home for 4 days and I’d lose control of the TV remote, the bathroom and my sanity! Then he’d be gone again and I’d get my freedom back – so the answer is, “No, you’re not a bitch”, it happens to the best of us 😉

  4. Funny, I stress over the same blogging woes! I can’t do too many funny posts or too many sentimental meaningful posts in a row or ill lose followers. Once, i was freshly pressed and had an onslaught of comments, likes and followers. This was a huge motivator and in the months afterwards, i produced my best works. And now its back slooow going again and I wonder if maybe it’s because I have become unmotivated and boring. But I guess whether you appeal to anyone or no one, you have to like what you write and that’s all that matters. I guess. Haha, I like all your stuff, keep it coming!

    1. Right, it’s hard not to worry about that sometimes! We want to keep our followers happy. But I guess we just have to write what we want and hope it comes out okay. Don’t say you’re boring though! I hear that’s what happens after being freshly pressed, after a while it gets sooo slow, perfectly normal. Hopefully we’ll both get more motivated soon. 😀

  5. Lily, I’ve been meaning to tell you ever since your blog about your upcoming vacation: Nobody’s probably going to un-follow you while you’re on hiatus. We might miss you, but we’re not going to go like “Lily hasn’t been around in a while. I think I’ll go find her blog site and unfriend her. That’ll show her!” Hope that eases your mind a bit. 🙂 And I know what you mean about having the man about. It’s so much easier to blog when they’re off somewhere. Of course, I have found that if there’s football on TV, I can pull out my trusty laptop and just come up for air when I hear the roar of the crowd and say “Oh! Did we score?”

    1. Aw, thank you! I know it’s pretty silly of me to worry so much. I guess I just don’t want to let people down, but it’s true…why would people take the effort to click that little unfollow button? 😉 Men, they’re something else! My boyfriend isn’t into sports…not much into TV either so UGH. I enjoy every little bit of alone time I get now, since it’s so rare. Men just don’t understand when we need peace and quiet to write! 🙂

  6. See, this is why I’m scared that if I get a boyfriend I’m going to become a bitch too. As nice as it would be to have one, when I start thinking about how much me time I’ll lose and I’ll *gasp* actually have to call someone on a regular basis, that kind of freaks me out.

    On another note, I completely understand your blogging worries. I feel the same way! But when it comes down to it, I feel like the people who stick around and show up from time to time are really the ones that make this whole thing worthwhile so don’t worry too much about the others (this sounds eerily like that Romney 47% comment…..). We follow you because we like you not only as a writer but as a person. So write on, however lame or brainless you think your posts are! (Which they never are btw) 🙂

    1. Seriously, don’t do it! Boyfriends aren’t worth it! Kidding, of course. They’re okay, lol. 😀

      I know you understand my worries, as you often have the same ones. I KNOW I shouldn’t worry. But I do…sometimes. Other times I just write and say, “Screw it… If no one likes this, then oh well.” Okay, so maybe I worry a little more than I care to admit. I’m definitely glad I have some loyal followers like you who deal with all my craziness regularly. 😀 Thanks for your kind words, and for taking the time to visit, as I know you have apps and all that going on! 😉

  7. Nobody’s blog is gonna be brilliance and poetry all the damn time. And bitch or not, it’s your blog, and you can do whatever you want with it. Even if that is just rambling out your current disjointed thoughts. 😉

    And I totally get the need for space. When my hubs is all up in my grill for too long, I’m like, “dude, this s MY dance space!” 🙂

    1. This is true, it’s my blog and I’ll do what I want! I don’t know why I worry sometimes. 😉
      I guess men just always get in the way, don’t they? Haha, your “dance space.” I wish I could just tell my bf to go away, but then he tends to do the opposite. So I have to sit here, ignore him, and eventually he’ll go away. 😉

  8. Oh I know how you feel. When Kristen was on 3rd shift, it was so easy to write, but as soon as she got back on 1st shift, I have trouble finding time to even post a quick note. As for the randomness, I think you just described every blogger on the internet. I certainly know I can go off topic at the drop of a hat.

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