*Satire-ish of an award acceptance speech*
Oh my Gosh, I just can’t believe it. I never thought anyone would like me, let alone nominate me! This is so cool and so nerve-racking, I think I might throw up. I must warn you, I repeat myself when I’m nervous. I repeat myself when I’m nervous. Gosh, thanks for thinking of me! I’m not even funny. I just PRETEND to be and somehow, I’ve fooled you all with my amazing acting skills! Oh my Gosh! *nervous laughter*
It’s such an honor. It’s such an honor. I, I, I don’t even know what to say! Thank you to all the people who waste their time idolizing me, it’s greatly appreciated! I don’t do any good for the community, but you love me anyway! Thanks for picking me, despite the negative comments being made about my being conceited. I am not conceited, I just really like myself.
Your never-ending support just goes to show how awesome I am! Maybe one day I can learn to be the amazing person you already think I am! For now, I’ll just continue using my superb acting skills to convince people of my greatness. It’s worked so far. It’s worked so far. Thank you to all the little people, thank you! I can’t say that I love you all but I can say that I love how much you love me! *raises award* I’m the best! I love me! Thank you. *slowly, very slowly, retreats from the microphone, bows 100 times, stares at reflection through shiny award, and finally exits stage*